Bachelorverse: Ranking the final 6

Where did the season go? One week we’re dealing with Whaboom, now we’re down to 6 guys left. The more invested fans in the franchise have full opinions of Bryan, Peter, and Dean. Dean especially is a fan favorite due to his interactions with people on social media and his progressive views. Not to mention the fact that he’s hot.

Except, the super-fans hyper-analyze everything, they get fully inserted into the world, talking on Reddit and other forums, following their faves on Instagram and Twitter, then listening to podcasts and devouring articles. It’s a rough life for a super-fan, hard to explain to non-reality television fans, and something I’m guilty of. Being a fan is fun though, the moment you meet someone with similar favorites and moods is one of the coolest things. When it comes to the Bachelor, even the people who get eliminated night one, there’s at least 5 super-fans with a fully formulated opinion on them.

So now that we’re are the final 6… The casual fan who only cares for the show when it is on is probably confused on how we have a final, with only 1 fully developed, 1 almost developed, 2 halfies, and 2 ghosts who have not been around. Well… That’s tough to explain. There is so much that is shown on camera and then stuff that is not. This season, we’ve seen extrapolation of many characters who did not matter for the main plot-line: Blake E, Lucas, Fred, Josiah, DeMario, Lee (?), and maybe even Kenny. Don’t get me wrong, Kenny’s been an important character for this season, but if you’ve noticed the rose ceremonies, Rachel is quick to reward her favorites, and Kenny was never there. Hard for me to see her picking him, and he’s not even in the top 6 now.

Let’s do some rankings:

1 Bryan (trending down)
He looks like Josh Murray mixed with Chad Johnson. Except his personality has been much better than either of those two. However, he does have the Josh Murray quality of making out where you can see way too much of his mouth.

So far the physical connection is there, but it feels like he has the upper-hand on her. Never a good sign for the Bachelorette.

2 Peter (trending up)
This man is killing the game. Their hot tub session was very spicy. He was gone so long with her that it felt like Peter had gotten a 1 on 1. Bryan has been the top dog since episode 1, but Peter is surging. His looks, his charm, and the fact that HE’S INTO RACHEL, is why he’s my pick to win it right now. I used to call him Matt Bomer, now he’s Peter, he’s a legitimate person.

What Rachel loves is a person who is into her, and is able to show it. Guys have either been too timid with her, or way too confident with her, even Bryan has had issues. The way Peter played with her in the handball game was the ultimate win for him, and was a decisive loss for everyone else.

3 Eric (trending up)
Might surprise you that I don’t have Dean here. I think we love Dean more than Rachel does. I really get the vibe that Eric is going to be in the final two. When Rachel is with him, there’s a ton of smiles, a ton of excitement, and I’m not sure if he has enough time to catch up to win.

He was one of the guys she most excited with from the start.

4 Dean (middling)
The biggest factor that has always kept him from winning this season, is the shear age difference. Dean is incredibly mature for his age, perceptive, a catch by the Bachelor casting and recruiters.

Like Caila on Paradise last season, Dean will be the hottest ticket that everyone wants to grab whenever he arrives.

5 Adam (trending up)
He is the kid who keeps getting a C- and passing on to the next class. Adam has not been cut yet. I feel there is something there with Adam. In all the interactions between him and Rachel, she’s always laughing and smiling. Genuine nice guy.

6 Matt
Who? Even I don’t know who this guy is.

In Memoriam:

Kenny
The two week paradise stretch should be easier to film. Don’t think he’ll find a wife.
My paradise match for Kenny: Danielle M

Alex
Good looking. Not a lot of words, but was a sweet dude. Had a nice Instagram post about his experience on the Bachelor and Rachel.
My paradise match for Alex: Astrid

Everyone else

Will was chill. Anthony seemed cool. Everyone else can go away.

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Allan Aguirre

26 years old. I blog about MTV's the Challenge and will dabble into other subjects occasionally. Follow me on Twitter for the occasional bad joke.